Brotherhood Cheats

I was talking to a friend online yesterday, when they hastily grabbed a piece of paper posted near the computer and began listing four principles found in the book Passionate Marriage by David Schnarch.

1-Know yourself.

2-Regulate your own anxiety. (Be conscious of what you leak onto people. Work life is where we often, for example, where we choose to show our best. But what if we stopped leaking the worst emotions inside us onto our closest supporters and family? What if we flipped who we give the best of ourselves to and we directed our best to our family and friends?)

3-Be non-reactive. (Our job is to be present for others, to hear them, but it is often not necessary to react.)

4-Tolerate discomfort for the sake of growth.

As we talked, we agreed these principles would probably go a long way for strengthening any kind of relationship–whether it is a working, casual or intimate one.

So I thought I’d share them as a simple tool for reflection as we think about what it means to nurture brotherhood in our lives every day.

**Don’t like the word brotherhood as it is used in this context? Help me think of another word here: symbols of brotherhood**