What if you could connect with old friends again?

At what age (if any) did the number of friends you were making slow down? And why do you think it did?

The other day, I asked this question of my Facebook community. 26 people weighed in, most of them noting a few junctions in life where friendships seemed to trail off.

The most common were:

• High school graduation (especially if they moved away to college)
• College graduation
• Moving to a new city
• Getting married
• Having kids
• Changing jobs

Several expressed remorse that a new stage of life had swept in, and they–unintentionally–lost track of some people from the previous one.

Finding old friends

This got me thinking.

I bet this phenomena–of letting distance creep into friendship and later wishing we hadn’t–isn’t limited to my Facebook friends.

Growing apart from friends (and later regretting it) seems to be a fairly universal phenomena. 

And if many of my Facebook friends occasionally think back to some former stage of life and think, I wish we hadn’t lost touch, there’s a good chance at least some of their friends are thinking the same thing.

Hence why I’ve decided we need a day where we set out to invite people back into our lives.

You think I’m kidding, but I’m not. Modern society has days set aside for all kinds of purposes. President’s Day, Memorial Day, Sweetest Day. Each designated to honor some group of people–our nation’s leaders, those who’ve served our country, our loved ones.

Invite You Back day (it probably needs a catchier title?) will celebrate friends from across the ages.

How Can I Find an Old Friend?

Here’s how you participate:

Step 1. You identify a friend or group of friends from previous stages of life that you think about from time to time.

Step 2. You reach out to them, casually, if needed. Perhaps it’s as simple as a note on Facebook, an email or a card in the mail with a couple thoughtful one-liners.

Hey! Was thinking about you today and all the great times we had. So grateful for those years. Would love to get together sometime.

(Maybe, depending on the reason you grew apart, it also needs to say I’m sorry.)

Step 3. You follow-up. Not everyone will be interested in reuniting, but some will of course. If you hear from them, plan an appropriate way to connect. If that’s intimidating, start small–a phone call, coffee, lunch, a play-date. If you don’t hear from them, maybe wait a couple weeks (life gets busy) and drop them a follow-up voicemail, Facebook message, text, reiterating, Let me know if you’d like to get together sometime. Would love to see you.

The point of Invite Them Back Day isn’t to force new friendship, but to create opportunities for old friends you have lost track of to step closer…if they want to.

And the great thing about Invite You Back day is…it can be celebrated any day you choose.

Go ahead. Start today.

Looking for lost friends? Or not ready yet?

Not ready to make a move yet or need help locating someone you’ve lost track of? Go ahead, tuck the idea away and watch for future posts related to this challenge (you can get my blog posts in your inbox if you enter your email address in my blog sidebar or at the bottom of this post). Your time will come.

And if you’re a face from a previous stage in my life, know this. There’s all kinds of red carpet rolled out for you here.

Have you reunited with an old friend? I’d love to hear how it worked out. Or, share what’s going through your mind after reading this here.