What Have You Lost? No. 1

There was a day not that long ago, a day that you (or your parents or grandparents) could remember, when ice cream parlors were locally owned and operated.

You saw the same faces–the owner, his wife, a brother or sister-in-law–behind the counter every time you visited for years.

You could order your standard favorite, your chocolate malt or your double scoop of mint chocolate chip, from someone who knew your name.

Slowly, of course, like in many industries, corporate manufacturers and chains from Ben and Jerry’s to Coldstone Creamery have raised the stakes on mom and pop ice cream. They buy ingredients in bulk, leverage huge advertising budgets and go to war over price points and customer loyalty.

And they knock a lot of the small town ice cream servers out of business.

And when the ice cream shop boards up it’s windows, the community of course loses more than just ice cream. It loses history–the nostalgia of place; the opportunity to take your kid back to the place where you ate chocolate-and-vanilla swirl cones after little league games. And it loses familiarity–owners whose kids went to school with your dad, your uncle, your brother. Merchants who gave back to the community, sponsoring summer softball teams or donating ice cream for the elementary school’s ice cream social.

But this blog isn’t about consumerism or saving small town America.

It’s about connectedness. And it’s about noticing when a little bit of connectedness slips through our texting, tweeting fingers.

Life is fast paced, so much so that we’re not necessarily even aware how changes in one particular industry impact the fabric of society.

That’s why no one protests when a mom and pop ice cream store boards up it’s windows, or even when large numbers of them go under. Because when local ice cream stores go under, we might not want it to happen. We might miss them. But it’s just one store. Or it’s just ice cream.

But the problem is it’s not just ice cream. It’s a lot of things–it’s the loss of local here, an automated system that replaces a human there.

And suddenly, the world our kids or grandkids are growing up in feels less connected than the one we grew up in.

Often times, we feel like life is racing away from us and the world is changing, and there’s nothing we can do about the loss of connection we feel.

But the truth is, while we can’t wave a magic wand to restore the small town ice cream industry, there probably are things we can do with our own families, our own homes and yards and habits to intentionally nurture community and friendship…even in a fast-paced world.

Each Monday, I’ll be devoting some blog space to imagining how we can intentionally build community in areas readers report a loss of connection.

So while we can’t bring back your childhood ice cream shop, we can build connection in some of the ways below.

1. Going for dessert? Skip the chains. Use Yelp or an App like Sweet Tooth to find and patronize locally owned ice cream shops.

2. When you’re stocking your freezer, select a family owned brand of store-bought ice cream – Fosselman’s, Calabash, Graeter’s, Gifford’s, Blue Bell, Woodside Farm, or Oberweis.

3. Chalk up some quality time with family and friends while making homemade ice cream. Here’s an easy recipe with only 3 ingredients. Have friends bring one topping each and make sundaes.

4. Make your home the nostalgic spot that neighborhood kids look back on someday. Serve ice cream, or even popsicles, to your child’s neighborhood friends every Saturday or as an occasional after school snack. Combine the treat with something else fun–face painting, tent-camping in the yard, swimming and round out a memorable experience.

5. Get to know the staff at any store you patronize often, even if it’s part of a franchise or chain. Don’t be shy. It’s not unusual to introduce yourself, especially when you’ve visited enough times that a clerk or cashier starts to look familiar. Share a little bit about yourself. Build from there.

Turn back the clocks a little bit and leave a comment to tell me about your childhood ice cream store. What was your order? Do you remember anything about the owners? Is the shop still in business?

Or want to tell me something else, besides local ice cream, that you miss? Check out the first post in this series here and tell me: what have you lost?